Men and porn

A blog called ASK SAM, on the Sydney Morning Herald website, asks whether pornography transforms men into picky people who judge their partners and the average woman compared to the big chested porn stars that they may be addicted to viewing.

There’s no doubt whatsoever that the whole industry of pornography is a problem and a half. It feeds the sins of lust and fornication, turns teenagers into sex crazed young men the more they look at it, and, as alluded to in this blog entry, causes these comparisons to be made between the material that they are viewing for self gratification and stimulation and their real life partner/wife.

The way I see it, porn is one of several different factors that lead to relationship problems and breakdowns, because what it does is removes the ideal of fidelity from what is designed to be a “2 become 1” partnership. Jesus made it very clear in his Sermon on the Mount – you look at a woman lustfully and you’re committing adultery with her in your heart. Denial that a man is doing something wrong as he clicks on images and/or watches videos merely helps feed the addiction and once the trap is sprung, it’s going to be hard to revive the trust and faithfulness that is expected to be upheld.

I can’t say that I am immune to such temptations – I have fallen and have had to acknowledge the fact that my actions were sinful. But to me it’s clear that the benefits of fleeing such temptation far outweigh the implications of untrepentantly continuing to immerse yourself in these unhealthy pastimes.

Finally I quickly wanted to address this line from the blog:

(Although ladies, a quick word of advice: never ever attempt to part a man with his porn. It just won’t work.)

If any woman is content with letting his man share his devotion and attention to you with visual stimulants, she’s in dire need of very close self examination (and I’m not talking about the type that helps determine whether you may have breast cancer). What on earth is wrong with delivering a word of warning to one’s husband, to cause them to remember the commitment they should have in the marriage that they are in? And if it’s an unmarried relationship, then that should be more than enough stimulus to pack your bags and end it. It seems pretty reasonable to assume that if a young man in a dating relationship keeps on unrepentantly indulging in porn before marriage, they’re going to keep on doing it when the relationship becomes a life time commitment. Is it really worth putting up with him sharing that devotion??

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